Find peace amidst the holiday season of chaos
The science behind 3 exercises that can help you manage holiday stress and benefit for months beyond.
While holiday lights and festive music are meant to spark joy, the season can also be complicated and even chaotic for many people. “As beautiful as the holiday season can be, it’s easy to lose sight of what the season should be about, which is peace and connection with other people,” says Rosie Curiel Cid, Psy.D., a professor and chief of Cross-Cultural Neuropsychology and Cognitive Neuroscience.
Stress, overwhelming to-do lists and difficult family reunions can make the holidays feel like anything but peaceful.
Yet finding calm is possible, even during the busiest times. Dr. Curiel Cid keeps a sign on her office wall to remind her that finding peace and calm starts within: Peace in oneself, peace in the world. Her advice to patients is the wisdom she needs for herself to cultivate inner peace to benefit herself and those around her.
Dr. Curiel Cid offers three ways to intentionally prioritize inner peace this holiday season, with research to show the benefits can long outlast the holiday season rush.
Breathe your way to inner calm
The quickest way to tap into a state of peace is through intentional breathwork, says Dr. Curiel Cid. A meta-analysis of the effect of breathwork on stress and mental health found that breathwork was associated with lower stress levels than control conditions.
Dr. Curiel Cid recommends a simple exercise to help you relax, reduce stress and bring a sense of focus.
Try this “calm place” breathing exercise:
- Sit in a quiet spot where you can breathe comfortably.
- Inhale deeply to fill your lungs fully. Feel the satisfaction of your chest expanding.
- Exhale slowly and empty your lungs completely. Allow your body to release tension.
- Repeat this process for 12 deep breaths or about 2-3 minutes.
- While breathing, picture a real or imagined calm place. It might be a childhood memory, a vacation spot or even a simple moment like sitting with a warm drink.
- Give this calm place a name. When life feels chaotic, you can mentally “visit” this place to restore a sense of peace.
The more you practice breathwork, the easier it becomes for your brain and body to enter this calm state. “Some people can access a state of inner peace more readily than others, but every person has the ability to enter that mindset, even if only for a few minutes at a time,” says Dr. Curiel Cid.
Navigating relationships during the holidays
Connection with loved ones is one of the greatest joys of the holiday season, but it’s easy to get caught up in obligations instead of meaningful interactions. This year, try to intentionally strengthen bonds that bring you peace and joy.
Whenever possible, prioritize time with people who make you feel understood and supported. Of course, everyone has people they find difficult in their lives. Dr. Curiel recommends “microdosing” visits with those who can be draining. “When in the company of others, if someone fails to resonate with you, strive to embrace them for who they are, rather than fostering conflict or hostility,” she says.
Research shows that social connections are worth the effort. An analysis of social bonds during the pandemic found that being strongly bonded with close circles and extended groups resulted in less anxiety and depression and better well-being.
Intentionally practice gratitude
Expressing gratitude during the holiday season benefits not only those you thank but also you. “Gratitude is a sense of sufficiency that you have benefited from a situation or what someone has done for you,” says Dr. Curiel Cid.
Gratitude has been shown in research to have lasting effects on your central nervous system and even on the brain. One study demonstrated that expressing gratitude through a writing intervention led to lasting neural changes in participants. Three months after the intervention, participants exhibited greater activity in the medial prefrontal cortex — a brain region associated with valuation and reward — when experiencing gratitude during an fMRI task.
This research is consistent with what Dr. Curiel Cid finds in her work with patients. “Gratitude is a state of mind that can be fostered, just like inner peace,” she says.
Try this gratitude exercise:
Dr. Curiel Cid recommends calling to mind someone or something that you’re grateful for. Feel a deep sense of thanks for what has been done for you. Consider writing it down in a letter and delivering it, which will benefit both you and the recipient.
Journal your way to positivity
Maintaining a positive attitude is more natural for some than others, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be taught. Dr. Curiel Cid recommends intentionally identifying small points of light in your day to improve your mood.
A positive psychology study by Martin Seligman found that practicing the Three good things exercise of listing three things that go well each day can improve your positive affect and perceived happiness. In the original clinical trial, study volunteers wrote three good things down for a full week. The benefits of perceived greater happiness continued as long as six months later.
Try this positive attitude exercise:
Dr. Curiel Cid recommends listing three good things on paper each evening before bed to improve your outlook during the holiday season and beyond.
Make peace a daily practice
Finding calm doesn’t need to take hours — it can be integrated into your daily routine. Small moments of mindfulness and gratitude can have a big impact.
- Start or end your day with a short breathing exercise or a moment of quiet reflection.
- Step away from holiday chaos by gathering thoughts of gratitude while journaling or on a short walk.
- If stress feels overwhelming, return to your “calm place” visualization. Even a minute or two of stillness can reset your state of mind.
“Every person is capable of finding their own sense of inner peace. If you’re new to this, it’s well worth it to be able to flex your emotional muscles so that you can expand your domains of operation in the world,” says Dr. Curiel Cid.
This holiday season, give yourself the gift of slowing down and finding moments of joy and connection in the present. Most importantly, says Dr. Curiel Cid, “Give yourself permission to enjoy the peace of the season.”
Wendy Margolin is a contributor for UHealth’s news service.
Tags: Dr. Rosie Curiel Cid, Holiday anxiety management, Holiday stress tips, Managing holiday overwhelm
